Aging is something we cannot avoid.   Everyone must deal with it.  How we age is an entirely different story.  Some of us do it better than others. 

Have you been out in public and noticed an older woman who is just absolutely striking?  What is it about her that gets your attention and makes you feel good about how she looks?  Is it how she dresses?  Or is it about her glowing skin?  Is her hair glossy and in an attractive cut?  How is it exactly that we gauge beauty or elegance or age for that matter?  Is that something we all strive for…looking youthful? 

Have you noticed that some people age poorly and look 10 to 20 years older than they are?

Do you ever wonder why that is?  Obviously, people who are living in poverty with no health care, little or no money to buy quality food, or have hygiene or beauty products, or even live on the streets will age differently than the average human.  And yes, their outward appearance will show the stress of their current living situation as well as their aging.

But all of us will age.  How we age and our appearances will be determined by not only genes but also our lifestyles.  Now that we know we cannot avoid aging, and everyone must deal with it, how exactly do we age gracefully?  Let’s examine that for a moment.  We all know that genes play a big part in not only aging but in overall health.  However, there are things we can do in life that makes all the difference.

You might think that going to the spa monthly or wearing expensive, tailored clothes makes the biggest difference.  Or perhaps you might attribute it to going to the gym or taking leisure filled, stressless vacation (ha!).  Whatever your belief is, I am here to dispel some of those beliefs.

Personally, I think that it is all about attitude.  Well, there are things we can do to make aging less stressful, but it all starts with attitude.  Have you ever noticed whether it be in a crowd or in a restaurant or just anywhere, that one person who stands out in the crowd as if she had a circle of light, a bright aura around her?  What is it about that person that makes her illuminate above all the rest near her?

I believe it is inner beauty… a peaceful, content soul, a person who knows themself, loves themself, and is at peace with themself even with aging.  Acceptance allows us to be free, free from negative comments, from unwanted criticisms and stares. Acceptance that aging is a cherished state, one that comes with wisdom and experience. It is a blessing.

A friend of mine once responded when I commented that she had lovely grey strands in her hair (at the age of 75) by saying, “Oh no, those are not grey hairs.  They are wisdom.”  I will never forget it.  She passed away last. year at nearly 89 and there was still not a wrinkle on her face and her hair is just about the same.  She had and still does have the greatest attitude…even about aging.

So, we can start with a great attitude about aging.  It is not a negative thing, but instead it is a gift.  Not all people live to be old. So, you see, if you have lived to a ripe old age, then you were lucky and you got the gift of a long life. Cherish it, celebrate it, live it. 

Along the way, there are things we can do for ourselves that makes aging more comfortable, more gracious, more acceptable.  Exercise, even if it is just walking out in nature, is great for joints, muscles, your heart, and your head. 

Does it help to wear nice clothes, get your hair done at the salon, go for a facial, wear sunscreen, have a gym membership and actually work out?  Does taking vacations help?  Probably, but I believe it all starts with having the best attitude and being grateful, grateful that you are still here on this earth.  A blessing.

Breath work is another great way to keep your lungs and your cells healthy, and it allows for a calming of the mind.  Meditation is also a helpful, healthy practice.  Learn to be in the moment, be present.  These are calming practices that are good for you and your body.

Eating heart healthy foods and consuming plenty of water aids in keeping our bodies more youthful and functioning.  As we age, it is critical that we attend to issues that arise and do not procrastinate to address the issue and heal our bodies.  Our bodies are temples and we need to respect them.  Treat them with honor and care so that they will last for the journey.

Socializing with friends and family and volunteering are ways in which we can continue to be involved and active both physically, emotionally, and mentally.  When we are engaged and active, it only serves to benefit us as individuals.

Self-care is critical.  Being happy, content, and fulfilled is necessary.  Find the things in life that bring you joy, happiness, pleasure, and contentment be it music, art, exercise, food, the spa, friends, time alone, family time.  The more we fill our lives with things we enjoy, the happier we are and happiness affects our attitude and aging becomes easier. The other night I visited the volcano erupting on the Big Island of Hawaii. I was with a beautiful friend. It rained on us, it was windy and pretty chilly. Afterwards having just witnessed a phenomenal episode with a fountain of hot lava some 1300′ high, we stopped in Hilo at the Temple Bar for some nourishment. I was a bit hesitant to enter being dressed for the outdoors and looking like a near disaster from the weather, but I was in a great mood because of the extraordinary experience of the volcano erupting. As I walked in, a lovely young lady said, “Auntie, you look marvelous!” Wondering why she thought that, I said, “Excuse me?” She replied, “I love your haircut. It’s such a great cut! You look so chic!” That made my night! Whether weather worn or glowing from the night’s activity, my inward happiness was obvious. And there you have it…attitude and contentment…enjoying oneself in spite of everything. Aging is not the end of the world but a journey to be honored.